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Okay so episode 308 of Maron gets me the brain tingles, one is zeitgeist is a good fuckin word to any of those cliche pretentious college/grad students who think everything is passe including passe. It’s like anything that wasn’t thought up or mashed up by some untouchable clique that are the trendmakers and force this wave of neologisms and pomo short-attention buzz heavy claptrap onto the rest of society and we must take it up or remain behind the times, fuck any conforming okay! Fuck this ever-expanding, trite desire and need to be “in” on the scene, to be oh so relevant to mushheads that must judge and critique every thing. Are these people just in my head? possibly. I might be venting the bitter hash and getting high off my own supply and maby I just wanna be annoyed and misanthropic because I miss it. All this one love doo wop nice guy buddha neutrality transition I’m doing is leaving me with bottled up bitterness I don’t want to let go of. I like being anti something, the teenage me is still smoking weed on my inner couch trying to wrestle with the loner side and the Belushi side. It’s a hot mess really.

Second is this whole idea of authenticity that he talks about. I love him for his realness, which has become this other thing we have to make room for instead of just being in it. Like Chappelle’s keep it real, we can’t really be honest in a dishonest world, people just do no go with being real and sincere, you get looks trust me. We must always hide away our trifles and knick knack problems from our relations, keep mental notes of what to say and what to disclose and rifle through them in those important moments. The working world is a hodgepodge of dos and don’ts that edges on the ludicrous. But who is even authentic, is that possible? Don’t you have to really know yourself and act in accordance to be authentic? Isn’t the true fact of life just getting to pure self-knowledge and awareness however possible. You can do it through good deeds, drug overdoses, pimpin yourself out, pushing limits, the goal is there for each individual I think. Our test should be the answer to “who am I?” And if you can’t be truly authentic till then then we’re all just faking it for the novel of our lives.

I spent so much of my 20s thinking I had to be real, everyone had to be, they had to admit their fakeness and bullshit, it became an obsession. I would get sick just from the sound of their voices when I heard the bs. Sharing too much information, ranting bout the suppression of art and true music in the array of commercial culture and mediocrity that pervades the media and shaped our lives whether we like it or not. But I am not alone in that, there are so many that become less fun and need to bitch about this overwhelming pablum we’ve all just accepted. I think some of us need to go through all that denial and contrast with mass culture to stay sane in early years and we just get bored of it or tired in the late 20s. There’s just too much negativity with it and you can’t utilize it for anything worthwhile except art or something. It all becomes picking battles and avoiding disturbances in the force. We don’t need to change people, we don’t need to be anti just pro our own thing. This is my pro.